Sometimes, no matter what we do, we can’t seem to achieve the things we want, become the version of ourselves we envision, or attract what we desire. We write down affirmations, recite them daily, but years later, our life still looks the same.

That’s because what you currently experience as "real life" is simply a feedback loop of what you formerly believed to be true about yourself.

And the less aware you are of this loop, the less control you have over your life.

Carrying on from Part 1 …

As we explored earlier, doing more isn’t the key to wellbeing—it’s the emotion we associate with our actions. When we take action to “get rid of” an undesired emotion or reality, we actually reinforce that emotion. For me, it was the feeling of inadequacy. The more I acted to escape it, the more I strengthened it—until I eventually fell off in all areas of my life.

This is why it’s crucial to examine the emotions driving our actions.

Are we being “ambitious” to seek validation from others? Staying in a relationship just to avoid being alone? Chasing a promotion to satisfy societal expectations?

The emotion behind our actions determines not only whether we’ll reach our goals but also if they’ll be sustainable. If you can identify and shift the underlying emotion, you can effortlessly change behaviors—even deeply ingrained ones, like addictions.

What if you’ve been taught about success and wellbeing backwards? I don’t say this to dismiss your beliefs but to invite you to slow down, reflect, and experiment with this idea in your daily life.

People take part in programs, courses, meditation retreats and workshops, all in pursuit of a better job, more money, healthier relationships, better sex, a soul mate, better health, overcoming limiting beliefs or enlightenment. But beneath every goal is a deeper desire—to feel different.

In all cases, they want those things because they hope it will make them feel different. Quite frankly, everything we do in life is to feel a certain emotion. We just want to feel emotions of happiness, joy, pride, certainty, security, safety etc… 

We all know the drill—more productivity equals more success, right? But here’s the real question: Is being productive really the answer, or are we just confusing movement with progress?

How many times have you found yourself saying, “I just need to be more productive”? I hear it every day: “If I could just stop procrastinating, find motivation, and do more, everything would fall into place.” But will it?

Discipline is much easier when there's something pulling you towards disciplined action (and being a disciplined person) rather than the friction that happens when you push yourself to do things that you don't want to do. 

I call it push and pull energy. Do you have to push yourself or do you get pulled?

Where does that discipline come from? And how can you become a disciplined person if forcing it doesn't work?

We’re constantly measuring ourselves to others. It’s natural. 

The way we define success—and more importantly, where we place our values—determines whether we feel fulfilled or miserable, no matter what we achieve. 

When you embark on your journey to create the life that you want or build your dream physique or nurture a healthy relationship there’s going to be times where you’ll feel like you keep going back into the same cycles.

You keep doing things that you know you have no business doing but for some reason you feel like you have no control over it. And that affects your progress. Now you’re back where you started and questioning why you always end up back here, feeling the same emotions.

Self sabotage is self destruction.

And if you don’t become aware of these 3 principles, you’ll end up repeating the same cycles over and over again …

Have you ever felt like you were doing really well—until you saw someone else doing “better”? Maybe you were proud of your progress, feeling great about how far you’ve come. Then, you scrolled through social media or saw someone excelling in your field, and suddenly, you felt behind.

One moment, you were content. Next, you were questioning everything.

And now, you’re using that as “motivation” again.

Comparison is sneaky. It disguises itself as motivation, but more often than not, it leaves you feeling inadequate, stuck, or like you’re never enough. The truth is, the more you compare, the harder it becomes to appreciate yourself, your journey, and your own success.

But why do we do this? And more importantly—how do we stop?

Creating your desired reality is really simple. It’s a straight path filled with obstacles. 

Those obstacles take on many forms and the majority don’t even know that those obstacles are even obstacles that need to be overcome or, don’t have what it takes to overcome them

If you knew what these obstacles were and how to overcome them, everything would change. 

I’ve summarized these obstacles into 4 principles. Let’s remove them..

If you can grasp this concept I'm about to explain, you will finally understand what it means to be happy. 

Happiness comes from solving problems. Let’s call it “suffering” as the Buddah said it. 

Let me explain…BUT before I explain, you must let go of your understanding of what happiness means to you. Or what you perceive happiness to be. This is because the current premise of what happiness is, keeps you in a hamster wheel.